Four Feminine Archetypes

Since coming across the book “Four Eternal Women: Toni Wolff Revisited – A Study in Opposites” by Mary Dian Molton and Lucy Anne Sikes (Fisher King Press, 2011), from about a year ago, not only has it made me think about the topic from time to time, but it has also become a conversation topic with my friends.
The book examines in detail the four feminine archetypes, which, Tony Wolff, a Jungian scholar, outlined in her work “Structural Forms of the Feminine Psyche” (1951). For each type, the book talks about the familiar characteristics, less familiar tendencies, career inclinations, and relationships to men/children/the other types, and above all, cites examples from myths, legends, and movies, making the concepts easy to digest.

I find the four archetypes very helpful in understanding myself and improving self-awareness. There are other types of personality tests that are used to gain clarity on self-understanding, such as the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator or the Minnesota Multiphasic Personality Inventory. For example, I once took the Myers-Briggs test in two different training programs that I attended in my workplace, which were two-years apart, and got very different results. Nothing significant had happened during those two years and my personality couldn’t have changed that much. Even though I had read a book about the Myers-Briggs test, I still found the results a bit hard to comprehend. If I had to compare the two, I would have to say that the Myers-Briggs test focuses just on describing a set of personality traits one has whereas the four archetypes provide clarity for helping women understand their priorities. To me, priority is like the strategy one applies to life, and personality traits are the tactics one employs. For friends who are struggling to figure out which adventure to dive into next, I have found that talking about these four archetypes has really helped them with gaining clarity.

Out of curiosity, I’ve also read a book that explains the four archetypes of men’s psyche: “King, Warrior, Magician, Lover: Rediscovering the Archetypes of the Mature Masculine” by Robert Moore and Douglas Gillette (HarperOne, 1991). However, as a woman, I’m not familiar with the nuances of men’s mental activities and as a result it doesn’t really resonate with me. If you are a woman, I wouldn’t recommend reading this book for the purpose of self-exploration.

Now let’s come back to the four feminine archetypes. According to Wolff, as cited in the book (p. 9), in a clockwise order they are MOTHER, AMAZON, HETAIRA and MEDIAL WOMAN, with MOTHER and HETAIRA being opposite of each other and representing personal relationships, while AMAZON and MEDIAL WOMAN being the other pair of opposites and representing impersonally related types. As illustrated in the model, each type has two adjacent types as well as the opposite type. In one way or another, all archetypes live within us—we know our preferred type the best, have some ideas about the adjacent types, and the opposite type is the one that we know the least about. The book maintains that individualization depends on the ability to first understand our archetypal preference and then integrate and assimilate the other archetypes into consciousness.

For each of the archetypes, I will quote the definition from the book and then follow with my personal experience and observation.

MOTHER

The MOTHER archetype is defined as a woman “whose primary ego priority is the well-being of her children (or charges)” (p. 11). A story of a woman named Hannah from the Old Testament book First Samuel (p. 10) was cited to exemplify the MOTHER type. In the story, Hannah cries every night longing for a child of her own. Her husband asks, is he not more to her than a son?

One of my ex-coworkers and best friends is of the MOTHER type. When we travel together, I always rely on her diligent planning and excellent execution skills, and all I need to do is to show up and follow her plan. Since she was a bit older than the rest of the team, it was natural for her to take on the big sister role and the team members really appreciated this. However, as we have matured over the years, that kind of help is no longer needed—we don’t even feel comfortable to be in such a position as to be looked after. In the same way that children will leave their mother, many of us have gone our separate ways. It’s not a problem for her though, because she has new responsibilities to take care of, especially, now that she has become a mother. What I have realized is that although it might be unknown to her consciousness, the MOTHER archetype will always find ways to use her nurturing skills, whether in existing relationships or by creating new ones.

HETAIRA

The HETAIRA is a woman “who is primarily committed to the quality of her relational life with her partner” (p. 14). Being Jung’s mistress for a time and his personal psycho analyst in his carefully planned confrontation with the unconscious, Wolff considered herself to be a HETAIRA. It was said that prior to her death, she destroyed all the correspondences she had with Jung so as to not embarrass Jung’s wife, as a result making the specifics of their relationship unknown to the world.

Usually the only clue that an outsider can see about the relationships of the HETAIRA and the man she’s involved with is the gossips they have left behind. If a woman is consistently the protagonist of the rumors circulating in the workplace or among friends, chances are that she is a HETAIRA, because she cares more about her relationships with her men than the trouble that the gossips might cause her. I bet we have all encountered a female coworker who stirred up the workplace, with the men getting a little more passionate towards her, while her women coworkers increasing the distance, because as a HETAIRA, her world was tailored to stimulate and satisfy the male’s attention, not the female’s.

AMAZON

The AMAZON archetype provides a portrait of women “whose personal focus, or primary ego priority, more or less unconscious, lies in the impersonal realm of collective consciousness” (p. 15). To put it in another way, the AMAZON is ultimately concerned with what she can bring to the world. The book brings up an unforgettable scene in the film Elizabeth I (p. 15), where facing her court and advisors, the queen announces that she would marry England.

Like most of my fellow classmates, I was educated to be an AMAZON where I was taught that we as individuals are defined by the contributions we have made to the world. This is not true as far as I see it today, because if you think about it, every life is a wonder in itself and worthy in its own right. For an authentic AMAZON, this world is a great playground where she can test her ambition and ability, and in return be rewarded by money and/or status. However, for someone who strives to be an AMAZON solely because she is told that this is the only way to success, she will likely feel empty despite everything she has achieved, because her achievement may not have been the deepest longing of her heart. Do I know of an authentic AMAZON? I have met a few women who are capable and have enjoyed the statuses they have achieved. However, I’m not sure whether or not AMAZON is their primary type.

MEDIAL WOMAN

The final category provides us with a portrait of women “whose primary focus is characterized by their basic preoccupation with phenomena related to the collective unconscious” (p. 18). The book states that a MEDIAL WOMAN stands between this world as we know it and the other world of a spiritual nature, and can range from fortunetellers to writers, psycho analysts and spiritual leaders.

When I was little, people used to tell me stories about ghosts and fate. A few even claimed that they could change a person’s destiny, although apparently, they were not able to save themselves from their own miserable lives. These women are on the low end of the spectrum of MEDIAL WOMAN. On one hand, I was so scared by the mystical stories these women told and what they claimed they could do that I tried to avoid them at all costs. On the other hand, they planted a seed in my heart and aroused my curiosity.

I have a friend who is on the higher end of the spectrum of MEDIAL WOMAN. What matters to her is her relationship with her inner self and the voice of her intuition. She once very excitedly shared with me her experience of synchronicity—while she was taking a walk along her favorite beach and thinking about a friend, as it happens, she caught sight of her friend walking towards her—which as far as I see, was only a coincidence of not much interest. I have realized that, although it is a little mysterious to me, as a MEDIAL WOMAN, my friend takes note of strange coincidences in her life and integrates them into her daily discoveries of her inner being.

While I was reading the book, I tried to recall experiences to see which archetype was my dominant one. I have found that along my life’s journey, sometimes certain archetypes develop and emerge into consciousness and sometimes they subside into unconsciousness. When my children were babies, the MOTHER type occupied me so much that it took all my attention. I believed that there was nothing more I could desire. As my children have grown a little older, naturally I have shifted focus to myself, imagining that there is a lot I want in life, and wondering how I could have ever thought I would live my life without pursing my own interests. It’s alright to have different goals at different life stages; however, I believe that we enter this world with a purpose: one thing and one thing only that we want to achieve with our short stay in this world. Only by finding our purpose and living a life in harmony with it can we attain happiness. The good news is that discovering our primary archetype will help us gain clarity about our purpose. With the clarity gained from understanding our natural preference and the capabilities accumulated by developing the skills related with the other archetypes, we can achieve individualization and live a more fulfilling life.

If you are interested in learning more about the four archetypes, check out the book for in-depth discussions of the characteristics of each type and how to apply them to be more successful in your career or relationships. The book posits that the “reader may even be quite surprised when her primary preference finally becomes conscious” (p. 10). I’m awaiting that moment of surprise.